Friday, March 18, 2005

Cookie Mom, cookie mon, who needs you?

I am not the troop leader. Also, I am not the cookie mom, though you never could tell by watching, even closely.
The first three years, my good friend Kelly and I shared 'cookie mom' duties. We had a blast. We collected the girls' forms, sat in one of our kitchens, drank tons of coffee, ate coffee cake, and figured out boxes sold, cases, multiplied by three, laughed, gossipped and griped.
Last year, Kelly's daughter dropped out of the troop, so I was to do it alone. No biggie, right. OH NO, here comes Caroline, Mrs. "6 thousand dollah hahdwood flawers' herself. Oh GOD if I have to listen to the story of the g-dmn 6 THOUSAND DOLLAH HAHDWOOD FLAWERS one.more.time. I will kill myself.
This woman is so freakin' clueless. She wants to help. She wants to be 'THE cookie mom.'
okay, no more responsibility for me, right?

WRONG!!!! (yes that is 4 exclamation points- OF FRANCE!!!!)

I, of course, have to hold her hand. I have to CALL HER AND REMIND HER OF EVERY STEP SHE MUST TAKE. ARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH.

Two years in a row now I have done this. This year, I have actually done EVERYTHING myself, because I cannot let Sally, my fantastic troop leader, have to do this too. She did not show up at the booth sale. She did not call any of the moms to get their money. This morning, and the money is due today or the kids don't get their extra 10 cent-per-box bonus, I had to CALL HER and tell her 'GIMME THE PAPER WORK YOU LOSER' and count all of the money (that I collected) fill out the deposit slip (that I collected) and now I am off to the bank to make the deposit.

Today, I told Sally to FIRE HER ASS.

grrrrrrrrrr


okay, I didn't actually call her a loser, I just wanted to sooooooo strongly.

8 comments:

mrtl said...

Reading about the Girl Scouts makes my left eye twitch just a little bit.

LadyBug said...

I'm just wondering if it's Caroline's daughter who drives you so batty (from your post the other day).

Broken Bindings said...

No, actually, her daughter is not quite as bad as the devil's spawn girl.
hehheh, when I went to bed last night this post was lost somewhere in the net, and I thought it was lost.
I almost threw my mouse across the room. I wake up today and here it, and you guys are!
heeeeeee

Greenthumb said...

I feel like a scrooge when it comes to Girl Scout Cookies...I always say no, and the Cookie Mom always gives me the evil eye.

Amanda B. said...

Do you think you could mebe smuggle some cookies to MS for me? I really need some samoas baaaaaad.

Candace said...

Frozen thin mints are my kryptonite.

And I have soooooo many versions of "six thousand dollah hahdwood flawers" in my kids' Tae Kwon Do waiting room it isn't funny. Only they talk about "this" camp and "that" class and "so-and-so's new vacation home".

Barf.

Colleen said...

hey, maybe she's too busy rolling around and loving her floors. " ahhhh, flowahs, you're so haaaaaaaahd....."

Anonymous said...

I can't believe you'd post anything bad about KIDS with their names on it. That is very uncool and unkind.