Every time I have the temerity to state, aloud or just in my head, "ENOUGH", life just keeps getting rougher. I love my life, my family, and my friends. They collectively are the only things keeping me from losing it completely lately.
In October 2003, my life decided to become one great big roller-coaster. On the same day, my Grandfather entered the hospital after collapsing on a cruise ship while away with my parents, and needed a cardiac velve replacement and my dear BritHubby got in a horrible motorcycle accident while riding in North Carolina. I live in New Jersey. Ahem.
Two days later, my dear,dear Dad and I drove down to Asheville, NC together to collect the hubby and dispose of his beloved bike. A probably very nice lady had decided that she NEEDED to turn left into a parking lot, directly into his pathe. He managed to avoid crossing the double yellow, nailing a tree, or dumping the bike, therefore managed to stay alive, still covered with real skin, and only broke his leg while t-boning her car and cruishing his leg between the bike and her door post. Several pins, rods, and stitches later, he was ready to come home. The warmth and caring shown by the Surgeon, hospital staff, and the group he was on the sponsored ride with will never be forgotten. Neither will the circle of support we received from The Bookworm's teachers and our friends. My parents and my sis took the cake, however. They moved in alternately, helping me cook, clean, change dressings, and distract my kids. I so love them.
My sis was finally pregnant, after trying for several years, and seemed to be doing well. Suddenly, she found herself in the hospital having developed alarming signs of very early labor. The lil guy was due in February, but after many many inconclusive tests and lots of failed attempyts at keeping him in, the munchkin was born on December 16, 2003. He was two pounds, 8 ounces. No kidding.
I kept finding myself thinking thins like, "hey, it could be worse." And it could.
Many many other medical disasters occurred frequently since then, all non-life threatening and fixable, for the most part. My kids have had their share, but nearly everyone is on the mend. I kept plugging along, avoiding somehow, massive MS flare-ups from the stress.
6 weeks ago, my dear dear brother-in-law found a big lump in his neck. After constant reassuring from docs that he was fine, the biopsy came back positive for malignant melanoma, which means it is already spreading. Just when we heard it seemed not to have spread beyong the one set of lymph nodes and was treateble with interferons, and had started to breathe again, his surgeon called him in again to tell him in essence "whoops, I missed something.:
He has four tumors in his brain. Malignant melanoma mobed from his skin, to his lymph system and then to his brain. In essence he has a 13% chance of surviving 5 years.
He is 44. And is one of the most caring, loving fathers to two pre-teen boys I know. And we love him. I can't type anymore. I feel so helpless. I have no idea what to say to him, or what to do.